SAN DIEGO (KGTV) — New details in the domestic violence homicide investigation in Bay Park reveal the victim filed a restraining order against her husband out of "fear for (her) safety" in the month before police said he crashed his pickup truck into her home and started a fire that killed her.
Stephen Coates, 62, is accused of killing his wife Monica Coates, 61, on Monday morning.
On Tuesday, a memorial grew outside her home, where friends, family and neighbors stopped by to place flowers and candles just feet from where Monica lost her life.
Police responded around 7:30 a.m. to the 4300 block of Dakota Drive after they said Stephen crashed his truck into the home. Investigators said he also started a small fire inside the house.
Officers found Monica dead in the master bathroom with severe burn injuries. Her official cause of death has yet to be determined by the medical examiner.
Stephen was also found in the bathroom with burn injuries and was rushed to the hospital, where he remains in a medically induced coma.
Stephen is in custody and under arrest for murder. Police have not determined if he was under the influence at the time of the incident. A toxicology report could take several weeks to complete.
Court records show Monica filed a restraining order against Stephen in November. In the filing, she said her husband had been "paranoid for the past several weeks" and she was "afraid for (her) safety."
"My husband believes that I am conspiring with others to kill him and his paranoia has made him erratic and makes me fear for my safety because he perceived me as someone he needs to protect himself from," Monica's request noted. "He demanded I remove my clothes so he could inspect my body for evidence to support his accusations."
A judge granted her one-year restraining order, which went into effect December 1, 2025.
Neighbors said Stephen moved out of the home, and the couple's two children in their 20s no longer lived there either, leaving Monica alone in the house.
Bang Duong, who lives across the street from the Coates family, said he was shocked by the incident.
"Family's really sweet, loving family," Duong said.
Duong moved to the neighborhood in 2017 and described Stephen as someone who used to be helpful and handy, even building fences for neighbors. However, he said Stephen's mental health had been declining.
"He normally is just like, you know, very friendly, happy," Duong said.
Referring to Monday's tragic incident, Duong added, "He knew what he wanted to do and I think he accomplished what he meant to do."
Neighbors described Monica as having a sweet, kind soul and beautiful smile.
They said she loved to try new things and even started playing basketball a couple years ago. Her friends and teammates showed up Tuesday to place a jersey on the ground with the name "Caterpillars" on the front.
That's the team she played for, which her teammates told ABC 10News was for the "rookies," or newcomers, before they can spread their wings and fly.
A GoFundMe has been set up to support the two sons, and help pay for funeral expenses, following this tragedy. Click here to be taken to the page.
The San Diego Homicide Unit is investigating the case. The San Diego Metro Arson Strike Team will investigate the fire portion of the incident.
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